dreamweaver says.

Thursday, June 22, 2006 ; 1:39 AM

19- 21 june: chalet
chalet is so sinful. we sort of gambled all day. okay. we didn't place any bets. but mahjong and pokercards are like everywhere la. and on the first night, everyone slept for only around 2 hours.
oh. and i got to go wild wild wet for the first time! the slide up was super fun! i've been wanting to try that one for a long time and i did. and for like 5 times?
woke up on the last morning feeling very giddy as if everywhere around me was moving. xian jie says it could be due to the rides the day before. which i think is quite possible. and for that, i find myself dysfunctional. i know i can be slow at times but with a reaction time as slow as that can be quite worrying.
it took a nap to get rid of the mini earthquake tremours. speaking of earthquakes, i got reminded of geography. :( and geography reminds me of 5 other subjects which i'm still seriously lagging behind in the syllabus. and the revision. and the june common test.

there's just this guilt that kept pricking me for the past one month that i really should start studying the 5 months of work i've missed and all the time, either i feel really slack or i'll bluff myself with excuses that i'll work extra hard the next day. there had been lots of things going on for me during the holidays too but still, i procrastinated with what little time i had and where did the holiday go? only 5 days left to school reopening.
this year, the very mention of school reopening left me with the greatest and deepest fear and dread. you know the feeling you get whenever your holidays end and all that playtime had to be taken away from you, those late nights had to stop and holiday homeworks to be due? and how about the feeling you get when exams are drawing near and you have not finished your revision and know absolutely nothing about what everything is being taught and the fear of the exam weightage on your overall results that pushes and stresses you out? how would you feel if these 2 fears combine together? it felt deathly horrible. and the horridness adds on when the work of 5 months in 5 days is mission impossible. help. i need help.